the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
