Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
