I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Randomize
