we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Randomize