I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
