All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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