thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
