i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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