Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
