i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
