They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
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