it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
tequila makes me forget i have legs
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
He has the fingertips of a God
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
