After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
