its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
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