ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
