I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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