So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
