Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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