so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
