Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(435): View more from Utah

Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood

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(425): View more from Washington

Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY

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(332): View more from

Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her

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(541): View more from Oregon

Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower

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(973): View more from New Jersey

Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time

(1-973): View more from New Jersey

you DO IT for the people

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(905): View more from Ontario

Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.

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