thus making me awesome and them whores
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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