Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
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