At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
