Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
