i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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