no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I wish there were birth control emojis
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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