my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
