Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
