We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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