i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
