the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize