i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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