Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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