i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
