Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
