Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
