do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
