Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
