He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
