he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
