Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
