What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
