Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
