Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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