I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Still dying that you shit outside
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
third nipple confirmed
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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