i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
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