As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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