at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
