So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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