my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
